Friday, June 26, 2009

Fat Friday

Happy Friday!

Why am I only posting Fat Fridays?!

Who cares? I'm sticking with it! Not giving up... persevering!
And... maybe because I have so many possible posts floating around in my head that it's hard to pin just one down! haha

OR maybe it's because I get caught up in awesome TRUE love stories like THIS ONE, that I don't have enough time to write my own!


Those sound like excuses, huh? Well, I'm calling them REASONS...

Anywho... Last week around this time I started coming down with a throat thing that KICKED my butt for a good 4 or 5 days! It was bad enough that I skipped Father's Day and Church to go down to the Comp Care Clinic (best visit there EVER... seriously, I was AMAZED - another story, another time)


So, now I'm thankful to God for allowing man to be smart enough to invent a little something called antibiotics and I'm back to persevering...

Simply put, it wasn't a great week, nutrition wise... the chocolate thing is hard to kick.


It's my crack.


New number system... I'm getting lost using "ground zero" because I REFUSE to write my actual weight down for fear someone will see it and post my embarassment somewhere on the world wide web so the world wide mean people can taunt and torture me, so now I'm going to just use the 1's and decimal to help me keep track. For instance, if I weight 140.8 (If only!) I would write 0.8.


So here we go.


Week 18917198 (I think I'm funny - that's all that matters!) - 3.4
(So, I could weigh 583.4 pounds, or 103.4, or 283.4... you'll just never know. And no, none of those are my current weight.)


Week 2 (this morning) 2.8

Down:
a WHOPPING POINT (.) 6


I'm just thankful I didn't go up, to be perfectly honest! It's (yet another) start.



CONFESSIONS:


  1. I already hinted as to my problems with chocolate... mini Reeses and Almond Joys may or may not have been the problem this week

  2. I rekindled a flame for licorice... while not BAD BAD in moderation, in heaps and gobs it's BAD BAD!

  3. I may or may not have enjoyed a new recipe for "fried squash". It was divine and mostly healthy... except for the whole oil concept...and I added some cheese. The girls ate it, so you know it had to be good...

    oopsy.


GOALS for this week:


  • drink water (pretty much failed miserably last week... does coffe count?)

  • No eating after 8pm (licorice tripped me up a couple nights)

  • Lose 1 pound (*sigh* I thought this was totally do-able - still do!)

  • Resist the birthday cake on Sunday. It'll be nasty and gross and disgusting, anyway. (Don't tell Auntie Kell I said that - it was purely for psychological reasons)

Friday, June 19, 2009

Fat Friday vol. 3

Here it is... FRIDAY! The last day of the work week - for most, anyway! I'm excited for the weekend even though I'm feeling an enlarged lymph node in my neck - sore throat and head cold symptoms - I'm definitely going to try and fight through it. (On second thought, maybe I'll pass the kiddos on to Daddy and hole up in my room all weekend! LoL J/K!!)


As I've posted in the last couple of depressing posts, I've been in a funk. I feel it may have something to do with the leveling off of hormones upon the removal of a certain IUD. That has not been confirmed, but I've lived in my body for most of my life and I'm really thinking that the IUD had and still is having a part in the roller coaster of things going on with my body.


So anyway, I have been struggling between - "is this my hormones or am I just a lazy blob?" ;o) It's probably a bit of both, but as I told my loving husband, "at least i'm still fighting through it... the day I lay down and give up is the day you should really be worried!" LoL!


So, I'm still here, fighting. I'm starting with Fat Friday!

I'm not even going to be embarassed that I'm starting BACK at ground zero.

And I'm even going to add a "confessions" segment, just because I want to be fully and thoroughly humiliated. haha j/k


So, I'm at ground zero... at least I'm not MORE than when I originally started.

My goals for the coming week:
drink water, no eating after 8 and 1 pound lost.


Sound small? For some, maybe. However, if you could have seen some of my habits over the past month or so, these changes are major.


Which is a nice segway into this:

Confessions

I *may or may not* have eaten my weight in chocolate.
I went an entire week without cooking dinner for the family.
I got the kids some donuts for breakfast and helped myself to a couple powdered ones.
I have been drinking *maybe* and I mean maybe drinking 2 glasses of water a day - if that!
I've contributed to eating out more than the budget allows.



Ok, I think that's all I can handle putting out there this week! haha


Wish me luck strength and willpower and knowledge!


Motto for the week:


"No More Excuses!"

Monday, June 15, 2009

Urgent Prayers needed for Princess Lindsay!!!


I have been praying for a precious little girl named Lindsay who had just recently been through a heart transplant! She just turned 1 in the hospital last week and it looked like everything was going better than could be hoped for, however this morning they updated with some scary news! She's in dire need of prayers! Please pass her around and lift her up in prayer!!! Click here to see the latest!


Friday, June 12, 2009

Bittersweet

I realize this is two fairly depressing posts in a row (at least for me) but I wanted to share something that happened last Sunday.
I'm coming out of my room after getting dressed... I step into the hallway in time to see Brooklyn turn towards me with the biggest, most proud smile...
"Look, Mom! I look just like you!!!"
Like I said, she was proud!
To which I replied, "No, Brooklyn... absolutely not!"
Just thinking back to how her face fell at my disappointment breaks my heart.
What was so bad about her clothes? Was her butt-crack showing? Did she have on a mini-skirt that was WAY too short? Was her top too tight and a little too low-cut?!
No.
She was very pretty and classy with black dress pants and a very pretty black blouse with a pink applique heart on it.
My reasoning is and remains, "you need to wear a dress on Sundays!"
Her defense, "... but I wanted to look like you."
To which I replied, "I wear pants because that's all I have! I would wear dresses if I *HAD* dresses..."
To myself... "dress that fit."
Eventually I caved because I couldn't stand the look on her face. I didn't want her to understand WHY I don't wear my dresses in the closet. I didn't want her thinking that she didn't look beautiful no matter what she wore. I didn't want her thinking I wasn't proud of myself.
So I did let her wear the pants... "this one time" ... and she looked like her Momma... one church member actually remarked on our matchiness... and that made her happy.
I don't have any wise words or advice or a lesson lurking here. I'm proud of my baby girl, but it appalled me that she wanted to look like me. Gee, not any self shame and doubt lurking in there anywhere, right?!
Again... prayers are always welcomed!

An update... of sorts.

I'm in a funk... a slump... a valley... in a something.
I don't even know...
What I do know is that I like these -->"..." ya know, the "dot dot dots"...
...
...they're my favorite.
I also know that I could use some prayers for my... funky, slumpiness valley.
(If you don't pray (dot dot dot) get a hold of me and we can talk about why you don't pray.)
Fat Fridays are ... haha JUST THAT... fat. No motivation, no want-to, no attempting...
just nothing.
I did have a certain IUD removed two weeks ago so I'm sure things are regulating in my body after that.
Does any of this sound like depression, maybe? That word has been bugging taunting me.
I realize that I'm a lucky blessed woman of God (dot dot dot) and I can feel His hand grasping at me. He's got a hold and I'm feeling the conviction... I'm struggling against the fleshy fleshiness of myself to heed and answer His call. I'm losing the battle, but not giving up on the war.
He's still working with me...
Keep me in your prayers (dot dot dot) please.

Monday, June 1, 2009

Not Me Monday



(Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week. )

OK, I most certainly did not wait until 10 p.m. to get my Not Me! post together... and even if I *had* waited that long, I definitely didn't do it in a hurried and haphazard manner.

I did not go on a beautiful, 3 mile, scenic walk by the river this evening. I did not push Emma in her stroller and Brooklyn was not riding her bike with us the entire way. The Tired Dad and Brenna did not stay behind at the riverside to fish... most definitely not.

I did not ruin said walk by coming home and eating corndogs for dinner. *sigh* Absolutely not me!

I do not have plans to go walking again tomorrow night, but eating BEFORE we leave...

I am not attempting to not stress about financial situations and employment... I am not asking for prayers in this area...

I did not allow my 2 older girls - now out of school for the summer - to vegitate in front of the TV for the majority of their first day off. TV rots your brain!

...

OK, a little lackluster, but there it is!