Friday, March 25, 2011

Karma and Shocker with a side of Salad Dressing.

Background:
I sent the Hubs and Brooklyn to the school for a Potluck. I sent them with the requested garlic bread and salad. I offerred to take her to her Band Debut the next night so that he could work late, so I stayed home to relax and do some crocheting.

Fifteen Minutes after he left, I get a text...
Him: "I shold of brought sald dressings" (he's a fantastic texter! ;o) )
Me: "Crap! They didn't say anything about dressing!!"
Him: "Can u bring some up"
Me: "Ummmm.... Can't u borrow some?"
Him: "Yes or no"
"Embarrassing"
Me: "Please try and borrow"
Him: "Bring some up please"
20 minutes later -
Me: "Just got this... Just borrow some"
8 minutes later -
"Just ripped my pinky toe on the garage door... Monm is gonna take me to ER"

So yeah, right after I sent him the late text, I went out to the garage to grab some yarn. I opened the door to the garage and put my left foot forward before I had the door open all the way and it slid over the pinky toe area. There was something sharp on the bottom of the weather stripping and I felt it scratch my foot. I yiped and howled and maybe said "CRAP!" as I hobbled down the garage stairs and waited for the pain to subside.

I thought maybe it was just a surface scratch and didn't know why it would be hurting that much... so I looked down. It was *not* a surface scratch. There was a gap-ish scratch with blood... lots of blood starting to flow. I get the heeby-jeebies just thinking about it now... and that was two days ago. OK, so more hobbling and blood-trailing through the house, to the kitchen to grab some paper towels, haphazardly wrapping my my foot in a gob of paper towels that are quickly becoming soaked with blood.

Ok, let's stop here. Can you tell from my vivid recounting of the tale that I was extremely scarred by this event? Well, I was! At one point, when I sat down to call my mom, my entire bod had a flash of heat - which I was later told can be a pre-cursor to fainting. Nice, huh?

Ok, so fast forward to the ER. It was almost empty, HALLELUJAH!! The intake nurse took one look at my toe and let out this horrendous "UGHGUGHGUGHGOWOOOHHUUUGHHH". I looked at my mom and gave her a look of "WTHeck?" Are they supposed to voice their horrified reaction? Aren't they supposed to keep that to them self? After all, I hadn't looked at my pinky toe since I wrapped it in paper towels and slipped my foot into my slippers. Guaging from her reaction, I thought maybe I was going to lose my pinky toe! This was the ER, afterall! Don't they see much more horrific nastiness emergencies in there?

So fast forward again to Room 1. My mom came back with me and I felt all fidgety.

Me: "So, uh, have the girls said anything to you about surprises?"
Mom: "No."
Me: "Oh, well... I guess I'm gonna have to tell you now that we're expecting.... again."
Mom: "You are?!" Half smile- half smirk. "I thought I heard you whispering it to the nurse. Something about November."
Me: "Yeah. It was a total shocker and it's still so early that I probably wouldn't have told you yet but I know I'm gonna have to mention it in front of the doctor, sooo yeah."

Immediately after that conversation, the nurse comes in, "Your husband and two children are here."

Mom: "Oh, Ok, I'll go sit with the girls and let him come in."
Me: Dumbfounded. "Uh... ok." pause. It started sinking in... "UGH, I didn't even have to tell her yet!"

I don't know what it is, but after 7 years of being married and 3 kids, I still get nervous telling my mom. And maybe a lil nervous about telling everyone else which is why I just dropped the bomb in a BLOG post.

So anyway, the Hubs came in and was very supportive as I got my "digi-block" - nastiest pain ever, btw. Ever, ever, ever. EH-VER. I did not look at my toe anymore. I hung out under my sweater, my leg and foot numb from tensing them so much, and just waited for it to be over.

Me: "So, uh... I guess if I would have just gotten my butt up and dressed and brought you some salad dressing, this probably wouldn't have happened, huh?"
Hubs: "Yeah. Karma."

I made it up to the Hubs by letting him document the occasion with cell phone pics and videos.

***WARNING**** IF YOU ARE THE LEAST BIT QUEASY, DO *NOT* GO PAST THIS WARNING LINE!******** SERIOUSLY*****DO NOT LOOK AT THE PICTURES AND DEFINITELY DO NOT WATCH THE VIDEOS************CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED!


Fine Print: If you made it this far, you are also agreeing *not* to make any comments on my long toes, dry skin, or un-pedicured feet. I'll sue you if you do!


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