Conversations with Red

Scene: This Tired Mom & her adorable middle child, "Red" are standing at the bathroom sink. Hair is being parted. Spray gel is being sprayed. Hair is being beautified two minutes before needing to leave for Church on Sunday morning.

Red: Mom, are you gonna be my kids grandma?
TTM (This Tired Mom): Yes, I am
Red: Who's going to be their grandpa?
TTM: Uh, Daddy is, silly.
Red: *giggle* Daddy is going to be their grandpa?
TTM: Well, yeah! Who else would be?
*silence*
Red: Well, we're gonna live in this house, Mom.
TTM: You are, huh?
Red: Yeah. When I'm a teenager and I have ki-
TTM:Um, wait a minute. You don't have babies when you're a teenager. You have to be married.
Red: *listening*
LM(Loving Man): *pipes in from other room in big, booming man-voice* YOU CAN ONLY HAVE BABIES WHEN YOU'RE 25! OR OLDER! *His tone seems to insinuate it must be obeyed and any other answer is unacceptable*
TTM: *continuing as if LM's proclamation had been nothing more than a whisper on the wind* As long as you're married, and you and/or your husband have enough money to take care of your baby then it's OK to have babies.
Red: seemingly accepting to this instruction. "We're gonna live here, though, Mom."
LM: YOU'RE GOING TO LIVE HERE WITH YOUR HUSBAND AND KIDS?! ALL IN THE SAME HOUSE WITH US?
Red: Ignoring LM
TTM: Where are Mommy and Daddy going to live?
Red: In another house.
TTM: You're going to make us move out so you can live in our house?
Red: Uh huh!
silence... TTM is letting her theory sink in.
TTM: Wait a minute... are you going to put us in an old folks home?!?!
Red: giggle AND a nod. UH HUH!

Lord, help us!